New 2011 Goals

January 4, 2011 picture of the day: My best girl, Amelia

This was a post that I wrote January 2nd:

[It is only the second day of 2011 and I might need to add another word to reflect what I should focus on this year. I have mentioned "grace" and "communication", but what I am feeling doesn't seem to fit into either of those categories. I am already feeling "discouraged", and no that is not the word I need to add and neither is "perfectionism". I have those things down pat.

Perfectionism and discouragement... the blog: I hate when I don't know how to do something. On the last blog I realized I didn't know how to add the pictures to my blog in the text... not at the beginning. Now today, I wanted to include the video "Paint Up the Sky" in this post, but I could only post it by itself. Just because I have been reading blogs for a year, what makes me think that I should automatically know how to write one? This will be a learning process.

Perfectionism and discouragement... Bible study. I have had the flu since last Thursday and have not felt up to reading or studying my Bible . My goal for this year was to read 5 chapters of the Bible each day. Now, as you know, last week had already read 15 chapters, putting me ahead 3 days. So as this is day 2, I am not really behind. But I because of my perfectionism I feel that I have already broken my goal. What I feel doesn't match up with reality, but I am discouraged.

So what word should I add to “grace” and “conversation” to focus on this year-- should it be truth: learning to discern truth and acting on that instead of how I feel-- or should it be forgiving: learning to forgive myself for not doing all that I want to get done.]

Last night I was laying in bed, again too sick to be up for very long, still thinking about perfectionism and depression and goals and organization. As I wrote earlier, I love organizing and setting goals, but if they only lead to me being depressed are they good things for me to do? Are organizing and/or the setting goals bad for me? Do I set my goals too high?I'm sure I didn't come up with all the answers, but I did decide that I need to rethink my goals. I need to set goals that encourage me to get some things done, but not so high that it is hard or impossible to reach them. Anything that I had planned to do everyday is unrealistic. I have to change the way I think about those goals as things I want to do instead of things I have to do.... So tonight I will spend some time looking over my goals and making them realistic and attainable.